How do you recommend I gain their attention and buy‑in for the project?

Having just kicked off a new project, I find that many of my stakeholders are unavailable and hard to engage. How do you recommend I gain their attention and buy‑in for the project?

Lack of support from your stakeholders sometimes happens because they are under time pressure and simply don’t have enough time to devote to your project. If this isn’t the case, then they may be unsupportive because they have some deeper concerns about the project. The only way to find out what is really going on is to spend time in conversation with them and to show genuine interest for each stakeholder.

If your stakeholders are frantically busy it can be difficult to find this airtime, but a first step could be to show genuine concern for their workload and seek to understand how you can help. Why not ask them how you can make it easier for them to contribute to your project? Maybe you need to move certain meetings around or change the way you provide them with information. Find out how they would like you to keep them updated and how they would like you to escalate issues to them. Would they prefer an occasional email, a formal progress report, a regular catch‑up in person or something completely different?

Don’t avoid a challenging conversation

If your stakeholder’s lack of engagement stems from a deeper‑rooted problem rather than a time management issue, you will have to take a closer look at the emotional component and the reasons that drive their unsupportive behaviour. What are the underlying needs that they feel are not being met? Could it be that their voice isn’t being heard? That the project isn’t giving them what they had hoped for? Or do they in some way feel threatened by the project and what it will bring about?

What can you do to uncover the real reasons for your stakeholder’s scepticism? Many project professionals steer away from unpleasant conversations and only interface with sceptical stakeholders when they have to. But the only way to improve the relationship is by having an honest discussion so that you can understand the real issue and build a foundation of trust.

Ask for advice and feedback

A great strategy would be to ask your stakeholder for advice and feedback. That gesture can instantly open up the relationship because you show that you care and that you are humble enough to ask for their opinion. Just imagine how they might react if you say: “I would like to ask for your feedback about the project. I value your opinion on how you believe we can work more effectively and deliver a better product or service to you. Would that be okay? Are there any aspects you feel we have overlooked? Which tips and suggestions do you have for how we can improve? What else?”

These questions have the potential to work wonders for you – but only if you show up with an open mind and take the time to really listen to the answers. If you walk into a meeting that aims to build trust with mistrust, you will undermine the process. If you fundamentally don’t trust or respect the other person, they will quickly detect it. So, take a moment to reflect on what your true feelings are towards some of your stakeholders. Do you look up to them, down on them, or do you fear them? Do you unintentionally exclude them from emails and meetings, or do you tend to speak badly about them to other people?

Have a long and hard look at the emotions and attitudes you hold, as they affect your interactions with people even if you would like them not to.

Building relationships is a two‑way process and realising that you have a role to play in changing a relationship for the better is a powerful first step.

Susanne Madsen is an internationally recognised project leadership coach, trainer and consultant. She is the author of The Project Management Coaching Workbook and The Power of Project Leadership (second edition now available).

THIS ARTICLE IS BROUGHT TO YOU FROM THE AUTUMN 2022 ISSUE OF PROJECT JOURNAL, WHICH IS FREE FOR APM MEMBERS.